Hello once again. A few months ago, professional wrestler CM Punk got on a microphone and pondered in part, "I splash some water over my face and ask myself, 'am I the bad guy?'" Today on Facebook, I pondered the same question. It had to be the events over the past week that led me to ask that question, but two good friends had the same response, "no."
I'm making myself out to be my own worst enemy with that kind of talk, and I have become that way over the numerous heartbreaks I've had, a somewhat toxic family environment growing up, and the perceived lack of respect from my peers, from my last couple of years of high school, through my time in the Navy, all the way up until now.
This afternoon, I got a text message from an old dear childhood friend that I still keep in contact with, and she has gone through much of the same stuff that I've had
Yes, I cropped the photo to hide her number. But it showed me right there that someone does care. nd that meant the world to me. Then I got a comment on the above post from another friend of mine from high school in North Carolina:
For a fleeting moment, the Chris Tyner of old suddenly came to life, full of vim and vigor and ready to challenge the world. The best version of me which also appeared when I attended broadcasting school in 2010.
Then I got to thinking, two things: don't give up, and never say never. I don't really have time to get into it now, but I have made some coinage the last couple of weeks. Also, I used to be really adept at creative writing. Thus, I should work on this blog more often. Like we said in the Navy, "damn the torpedoes full speed ahead." But I also lamented some things. Such as missing my daughter's birth because I was too new at the Post Office to take any time off. Not having anyone to share my hopes, dreams, and even my secrets with. That's what probably hurts the most. Not bring able to do that.
The moral of this story is that despite the doom and gloom that was this weekend, I do have some hope. It may be a little, but sometimes a little is more than enough.
Now if only I can get her to talk to me...
More to come later this week, and don't forget where you can find me on social media:
Bonyscribe on Twitter and Instagram and bonyscribe1 on TikTok.
CT
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