Monday, September 2, 2024

Labor Day Weekend Sh*tposting...

 Hello again everyone. Can you believe it's September already? Guess we should be making preparations to wake up Green Day when this month ends. Anyway, as Cody Rhodes would say, "what do we want to talk about?" Well, I have several things I want to touch on this long weekend. Some news, some college football, some racing, and some wrestling.







Let's start with college football, which started in earnest this weekend. First off, the College Football Playoff is bigger; twelve teams get in, which I assume will grant automatic bids for the winners of each of the four big conferences. Speaking of conferences, that's the second thing I wanted to mention. We no longer have a power five anymore, the Pac-12 all but dissolved when all their members sans two (Washington State and Oregon State) bolted to other conferences. Washington, Oregon, UCLA and USC went to the Big 10, Arizona, Arizona State, Colorado, and Utah went to the Big 12, and Cal and Stanford went to the...ATLANTIC COAST CONFERENCE?! Weird flex, but okay. Also, Texas and Oklahoma left the Big 12 for the SEC.

So that now gives us a whopping 16 teams in the SEC, I guess "it just means more" means more teams. I don't know how perennial bottom feeder Vanderbilt will be competitive...hold up (checks notes). Oh, they beat Virginia Tech on Saturday. Never mind. I think the usual suspects will dominate the conference this year in Alabama and Georgia, but also Texas will be in the mix as a first-year conference member. Don't sleep on Oklahoma either. As for the school in the SEC I once rooted for, Florida's going to have a long season. They got throttled by Miami in their home opener and have arguably the toughest schedule in America. Sorry Gator fans, but Captain Overrated (Tim Tebow) isn't walking down the tunnel anytime soon. Thier fans are probably dropping to their knees hoping that the Almighty Tebow can coach the team next season, I just wish that Gator fans would stop obsessing over Captain Overrated. "BuT hE wOn Us TwO NaTtYs aNd Is A hEiSmAn WiNnEr!" Hey Gator fans...







On to the Apathetically Crappy Conference, which I mentioned before added Cal and Stanford, as well as SMU?! I don't know who's going to come out of that conference, maybe Clemson (who got poleaxed by Georgia). But both them and the other top contender (Florida State) crapped their pants in Dublin against Georgia Tech, what a time to be alive! At least North Carolina and NC State won this weekend, so there's they have that going for them.

On to the Big Ten Times Two Minus Two (seriously, there are 18 teams in that league now). That league will be unwatchable because for starters I cannot stand Ohio State. Secondly, Michigan is now the Houston Astros of college football. Sadly, both teams are the odds-on favorites to win that league this year; I don't think Washington or Oregon will capture that conference, though either one could make the CFP. Oh, and Northwestern is playing in a temporary facility while Ryan Field gets redone.

Finally, we come to the Big XVI, formerly the Big XII. I really don't know what to expect from them now that Texas and Oklahoma are in the SEC. Maybe Baylor, maybe TCU. I do know we're getting the renewal of the Holy War (Utah-BYU). As for UCF, I hope they 1) beat Florida and 2) reach a bowl game. 

As for Washington State and Oregon State, they're playing members of the Mountain West, and I think will have their games on the CW Network with one of their announcers being Thom Brennaman, Brennaman hadn't been seen on TV since 2020 when he made an off-color comment on a hot mic as there's a drive by Castellanos into left field and that'll be a home run. And that'll make it a 4-0 game. All kidding aside, it's nice to see one of the more talented sportscasters around back on TV. My guesses for who the G-5 (non-power conference) teams to make the playoff, well I'm guessing either James Madison or Tulane. Possibly Libbity Bibbity (Liberty U) will be selected.





Speaking of Liberty University, William Byron and fifteen others begin the NASCAR Cup Playoffs next weekend. Unfortunately for that sport, the NFL kicks off next weekend, and they will all but forgotten in the realm of sports. One issue I have with NASCAR is it seems like the endings to all of their races have become too WWE-like. Someone wrecks someone else with two laps to go and we wind up with A green-white-checkered finish, where more often than not the process repeats itself. As long as a race doesn't end under caution though...ridiculous. Another issue is some of the sponsors the racers have. We used to see sponsors like Budweiser, Coors, Square D, Havoline, Gatorade, etc. on these cars. Nowadays you have sponsors that are subliminally political, like Liberty University, the "He Gets Us" (who exactly, Captain Overrated?) evangelical campaign, or glorified ambulance chaser extraordinaire Morgan & Morgan. No wonder Kyle Busch didn't win a race this season and failed to reach the playoffs. What's next, Justin Algeir will have a car sponsored by 1-800-Ask-Gary?? We had a failed Trump for President 2020 sponsorship by Corey Lajoie that year, and he finished next to last at the Brickyard 400. At least IndyCar has decent sponsors on their rides. 

Well, I think I've said enough for this weekend, I'll be back later next week with my NFL preview and Week 1 picks. Later.


BonyScribe


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